Waiting to Divorce Is Not Necessarily Better for Your Children

So-called grey divorce among those aged 50 or over is an area of divorce on the increase. Whether you delayed for your children’s sake or some other reason, you may be surprised to find that it could affect your adult children more than you think.

How might divorce affect your adult children?

  • Holidays will never be the same: If Thanksgiving and Christmas were a special time in your family, your children might get upset about this. They may have looked forward to sharing this family ritual with their children. Now they can never be together as a family again.
  • They are upset with you: They might feel you lied to them by putting on an image of a happy family. If you are divorcing because you met someone else, they may get upset at seeing your new man sitting in dad’s place at the table.
  • They feel caught in the middle: Aside from having to decide which of you to invite for Sunday lunch, they can also feel trapped and pressured to take sides.
  • They feel obliged to help you: If you divorce, you lose a partner you relied on for certain things, be that organizing the finances or changing the lightbulb. Once you divorce, you will no longer have them to call upon. It can be tempting to call up your children to help you. Bear in mind that they have other demands on their time.
  • It may diminish their inheritance: Your children may consider you are spending money destined for them on your new partner.

There is no easy time to divorce. It will affect your children in some way whenever you choose to do it. Yet you have a right to be happy. Seek legal advice to find out more about how the divorce process works and whether it is right for you.

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