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How to have a workable relationship with your co-parent

As parents, while divorce will separate you in the eyes of the law, your lives will remain inextricably tied due to the children you have in common. As hard as divorce is for you, remember it is even harder on your kids. The better you and your co-parent cooperate, the easier it will be for your children.

Focus on what is important when co-parenting

Many child custody disputes arise due to minor differences. When co-parenting, think about what kind of child you want to raise. Think about what morals and values you want to instill. Arguing with your co-parent about whether your child can put sugar on their cereal will only make life more difficult for you and your children.

You do not need to be best friends with your ex

You do not need to enjoy your ex’s company. If you can’t have a friendly relationship with them, think of it as a professional relationship. Consider the people you work with. Some you get along with well, while others you learn to work with, despite your differences. Being a parent is perhaps the most important job that exists. To do it well, you need to cooperate with your co-parent.

You do not need identical parenting styles

You might have a different parenting style than your ex. Look at that as an advantage rather than a disadvantage. Imagine how limiting it would be if every teacher taught in the same way, only exposing your child to one way of thinking. You and your co-parent are the most important teachers your child has. Your different parenting styles help prepare your child for a world full of different opinions and ways of doing things.

If you are worried about your ex’s parenting decisions, step back and consider if it really matters. Some things do matter, and there are legal options available. Other times, the best option may be to accept the differences and avoid conflict.